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On May 11th Australian singer/actress Holly Valance will celebrate her 25th birthday.
She now resides in Los Angeles and is dipping into the American film scene. C’mon Hollywood, let’s get the ball rolling!
Check out Holly Valance’s Miss COED gallery after the jump! Read More »
That is the actual headline from the London Telegraph Website. The accent the New Zealand man’s voice changed to was Australian, he claimed, as part of a pequliar prank on the police.
From the article:
Arthur Cradock, 48, from the South Island town of Motueka [New Zealand], called police last month to tell them he was being raped by the marsupial at his home and needed urgent assistance.
Cradock, an orchard worker, later called back to reassure the police operator that he was all right.
“I’ll retract the rape complaint from the wombat, because he’s pulled out. Apart from speaking Australian now, I’m pretty all right you know. I didn’t hurt my bum at all.”
You know, we don’t really have anything like that here in the States–a burning desire to shame the name of your closest territorial rival to the point of personal humiliation. When was the last time you claimed to be raped by Splinter (wombats are giant karate master rats, right?) just to make fun of your neighboring state? Never, that’s when.
When I threw a pajama-party at my parent’s house in New Hampshire a few years back, about 70+ people showed up; it was outta control for my 18-year-old self, with girl’s lifting their shirts (revealing bras!) and dudes pissing themselves after having one beer (not “one-too-many” - just one).
Once my parents got word from the neighbors that a MASSIVE PARTY was underway at our house, they came home a day early, catching me in the midst of post-party cleanup.
Needless to say, my dad punched me in the face. Several times. Hard.
Sixteen-year-old Aussie teen Corey Delaney throws a party where 300+ kids show up with property damages exceeding $17,500 - and what happens to him? The arrogant little prick gets full media coverage, internet celebrity status, his very own Facebook Group and now, a chance to legitimize his wildman antics by becoming a professional party promoter.
Talk about repercussions. Read More »
The use of performance-enhancing drugs in sports is a slippery slope indeed.
Olympic athlete Marion Jones was stripped of her medals and wiped off the record books today due to her use of steroids during the 2000 Summer Olympic Games in Sydney, Australia. She admitted in October to using steroids in 2000 prior to the Olympics, and had returned her medals to the Olympic Committee before today’s announcement.
Not only has Jones lost her medals and records, but she’s facing the very real possibility of being banned from all future Olympic games.
Jones’ irresponsibility may have also jeopardized the gold medals of her relay teammates. She will be sentenced on January 11, and could face between three to six months in jail.
With several athletes this year being dragged through the mud for drug use, one must wonder: does the use of performance-enhancing drugs ruin the reputation of popular sports exclusively? Do we as a society frown upon athletes that use steroids while some musicians take “art-enhancing” drugs on the regular just to attend rehab and be awarded with a big thumbs-up from the public? Read More »
VIDEO/AUDIO: Not only did the Indianapolis Colts lose against the New England Patriots 24-20 but they also used Milli-Vanilli-esque fake crowd noise…caught on video/audio.
NPR launches its snazzy new music site with great success!
A bonafide shocker: women smell better when they’re ovulating.
How many points does one get in Buck Hunter for this gem?
Cops stumble upon a marijuana wonderland (and the owners of said wonderland) when searching for missing hikers.
Guy in Australia gets charged for DUI. Three times. In 24 hours.
In a world where strippers make more money than most political figures, is it wrong to teach the youth of today the art of pole-dancing?
The answer is a resounding YES.
In Australia, kids - I’m talking kids, like 7-year-old girls and boys - are being registered (by their parents, mind you) to take pole-dancing lessons.
Yes: everybody knows that strippers are well-toned athletes and intense trainers that go for the Olympic Gold every time they bleach their ******* and dollar bills get stuffed straight up their G-strings by old pervs.
When did throwing the ball around become too passe? When I was a strapping young man I would chop wood and shingle roofs to get my bod looking like this guys.
Now we have kids not old enough to handle their no-no parts correctly gyrating and shimmying up stripper poles in the name of exercise.
Grab an axe and chop away, young boy - at the very least you’ll be able to fend off anybody who attempts to kick your ass when they hear about your past experience sliding down a stripper pole.
And girls? Don’t worry - you’ll have plenty of time in the future to handle poles.
Kentucky State Senator Ernie Chambers plans on suing God to prove a point about frivolous lawsuits. In return, God plans on splitting Chambers’ head open with a lightning bolt to prove a point about dumbass statements. (KETV)
Ex-teacher at Plymouth Christian Academy faces sex charges, accused of having sex with her 15-year-old student. Somebody find this “poor boy” and give him the “Luckiest Kid in the World” award. Niiiiiiice! (Detroit News)
Not niiiiiiice: an assistant U.S. attorney from Florida arrested in an Internet sting operation after flying to Michigan to have sex with a 5-year-old girl. Yes, that’s right - a 5-year-old. Five. (Breitbart)
Earthtimes is at it again, boggling minds worldwide with amazing factoids such as this: “If seeking a mate or sizing up a potential rival, good-looking people capture people’s attention in a half of a second.” Wow. Eureka. (Earthtimes)
A lesbian couple in Australia is suing their doctor $400,000 for having twin girls after he implanted two embryos instead of one in the birth mother. I personally can’t wait until one of the twins finds out they’re a mistake that mommy and mommy didn’t want. Yay for Girl Power! (News.com)
Some politicians debate on issues via live television, others stuff taxpayers money up a stripper’s G-string. They handle politics differently in Australia, as evidenced by the scandalous happenings with Kevin Rudd at a strip club four-years ago in New York City that have only been unveiled recently.
So, who’s the provider of this dirty inside information just in time for election season?
None other than whistle-blower/cock-blocker Rupert Murdoch. Read More »
