Five Steps to First Base

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After spending the last few months speaking at universities in the Northeast, there’s one question that keeps coming up. (No, it’s not “who farted?”)

“What’s the best way to approach women at school?”

Fret not, young ones. Here’s how to get love in three everyday , mundane areas on campus. And, unlike alcoholism, you can solve this in just five easy steps!

1. Find her when she’s alone. It’s not as creepy as it sounds. You stand a greater chance of meeting her when she’s by herself than with friends. She’ll be more receptive to your charms.

2. Observe something about her. What is she doing? What is she wearing? What is she eating? What’s she reading? Observations lead to conversation.

3. Start talking. Now that you’ve summed her up, talk! Use what you have observed as a starter ( not in a stalker, I - know- your - underwear - color kind of way). Don’t worry about saying the right thing; think less, talk more. Read More »

Top 7 Locations to Meet Single Girls

The following article satire is brought to you by the folks at COED:

Top 7 Locations to Meet Single Girls

I often find myself asking myself (is that a run on?) “where is the perfect location for meeting girls?”

Sure, clubs are often the first place that comes to mind, but my cute pick-up lines don’t always work well when attempting to talk over loud, fist-pumping music to orange-skinned girls from Staten Island.

A desperate fella like me must suck it up and meet girls the hard way: in real life. Read More »