13 Facts About Women…Men Forget

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Women confuse men. That’s a given. But it’s not because we don’t learn from our past relationships; we just forget everything we learned in the time between one and the next. And we only remember how different the two genders are when a woman’s inherent eccentricities rear their wild head, once again.

To keep things in check, we’ve compiled a cheat sheet to help you keep your girl’s differences in perspective with COED’s 13 Facts About Women Men Forget. So no matter how cool the chick, chances are she (is)

Full of Sh*t: Before you call NOW, let us just say that this is only a periodic trait, and exists in varying degrees. Most of the time, it comes out in what we like to call a “game,” but outside of a relationship it’s called lying. Basically, she tells you one thing, but means something more than her words. (Words only seem to matter when she remembers to use yours against you.) Other times, it happens when she thinks lying serves a purpose greater than the truth of the moment. So, she might have gone to lunch with her ex and said she didn’t–but he was a dick like usual, so it wasn’t a big enough deal to tell you about (i.e., she cares about you enough to not want to hurt your feelings, but not enough to stop looking elsewhere). Now, try going out with your ex… Read More »

Slutty, Wasted Girl in Bathroom Teaches Us Not to Drink and Drive

Drunk girl

Drinking too much is bad. Urging people to drink safely and stay away from their car after a few beers is good. Using a half-naked chick to tell people drinking too much is bad, especially if they want to drive…is really confusing to say the least.

Arrive Alive, an organization devoted to ending drunk driving, has recently begun a prevention campaign that consists of lifelike stickers of a totally wasted girl in both men’s and women’s restrooms. The girl in the men’s restroom sticker is sitting with her thigh-high stockinged legs apart, eyes drooping, as though she’s just stumbled into the wrong bathroom and collapsed on the floor. I’ll sober up when I’m behind the wheel, her black shirt states.

The same girl is featured in the women’s restroom sticker, except this time she’s on all fours, presumably throwing up with her thong underwear clearly showing. I just need to get it out of my system, her shirt explains. Do these ads really deter drinking and driving? Read More »

Blondes Make Boys Bimbos?

Jessica Simpson dumb blondeThis weekend The Times published an article about the “bimbo delusion,” which is the act of men stereotyping blonde-haired women.

According to studies done by Thierry Meyer, a professor of social psychology at the University of Paris, men subconsciously drop their IQ level upon contact with a blonde.

Men dumb themselves down for blondes exclusively? Interesting theory, but yeah…no.

While I can personally attest to dumbing-down conversation to bimbos, it must be said that the phrase “bimbo” can be used towards any person who comes across as being dumb as a brick.

A rabble-rousing study like this needn’t be broken down: from Guidos to Gingers and names too foul to print, stereotypes nearly always get in the way of a person’s core personality. (Admittingly the article states this exact point.)

But since we’re talking about blondes, let’s at least have some fun with it. I mean, they always have more fun anyways, right?

Check out the Top 5 “Blonde Moments” on Video after the jump.

Read More »

Chivalry Equals Equality

Classy Guy

I consider myself a classy guy - opening doors for people, walking the not-so-able elderly across the street and occasionally giving food (or money) to the homeless. More importantly, I always make sure to keep constant with one thing when it comes to being charitable: equality.

If somebody needs assistance in any way, shape or form within reason I will help them, no questions asked. This brings me to the question at hand: why should being chivalrous be exclusive to women? Doesn’t everybody deserve equal treatment?

The phrase “that’s not how you treat a lady” has bothered me ever since I reached puberty. Who came up with the idea that women and women only deserve special respect? Is it not important enough to know how to “treat a man?” Does it not matter at all? Read More »

Masturbate Often? Try the Rubbot on for Size…and Eternal Embarrassment

The RubbotYou know what’s so weird, yet so understandable? If a women gets caught masturbating with some wacky device most guys would say, “niiiiiice” and be turned on. Now, if a girl walked in on a sweaty dude huffing and puffing away, plugging some doll…well, it’s not exactly a turn-on, is it?

But wait, sex-starved fellas! Your time has come, for the Rubbot is here to prevent you from embarrassing “caught you!” masturbation moments (no it isn’t, and no it won’t).

The Rubbot, still under development, is basically a blue donut that you stick your wang in for pleasure - not embarrassing in the slightest, right? Using the Inch Worm Theory, the dirty donut (with a glory hole) uses a two-cam roller that creates a “rubbing” effect on the shaft of your staff. The Rubbot can provide maximum pleasure…if you’re not getting laid already, that is. Read More »

Hooters: Eat Fried Food, Feel the Misery

Hooters Girls

Hooters? Depressing? You don’t say. All I’ve ever had to do was take a look at the horrible orange and white paint job adorning the outside of most Hooters restaurants to know those places are a bevy of bad taste and depression.

Oh yeah, and fifteen year olds.

In my town, Hooters was the place adolescent boys with fake IDs and too much cologne spent their Friday nights when no one their own age would date them.

Hooters was the place high school’s biggest assholes went to feel superior to women who would never look at them in real life, as well as the place a friend’s friend once tried to work at but quit after some perv threw a popcorn shrimp at her boobs.

In conclusion: Hooters is drenched in grossness. Read More »

Frat Boys Attempt to “Calm Down� Their Image

frat

When I think of fraternities, I often think in images; beer pong tables, guys running around without pants, pledges standing out in the rain and screaming renditions of the school’s fight song…you know, the typical, Hollywoodified version of Greek life.What I never picture is yoga.

No, not toga. Yoga. As in stretching and breathing. As in Fraternity brothers stretching and breathing together at 8 A.M. Read More »

Virgin Cream = Virgin Scheme?

Virgin Cream

I’m down for poonany preservation, but this is something else.

Virgin Cream, a $60 cream that acts as a vajajay time-machine of sorts that (supposedly) tightens up a woman’s womanhood back to its more “youthful” days. The website boasts claims such as this:

If You Would Like To:

Be a woman that nearly all men… just can’t resist, this is going to be the most important message you will ever read.

Here Is Why:

Let’s face it… almost any woman can get a man to have sex with her. You don’t have to be pretty. You don’t have to be sexy. You don’t have to have a great body. Basically, you just have to be a woman who will say “yes” and thousands of men will have sex with you…

Once!

But, what if you want that same man to call you for another date? Well, that might NOT be so easy. But, what if there was a way to make sure… almost every man… wanted to go out with you again? Better yet, what if there was a way to make having sex with you… so fantastic… the man you are interested in… couldn’t even think about another woman? What if there was a way to make having sex with you… so good… a man would do anythingeven marry you… to keep you in his bed?

Whoa! Talk about demoralizing! I love it. Read More »

Log On, Get Off: A Girls Advice to Online Dating

I have a confession: I’m an online dater.

A little over a year ago, after my Big Breakup of 2006, I decided I needed to get out there. And get out there, I did. I dated my way through New York City, often with humorous results. Some dates turned into brief relationships, some turned into ranting emails to my best friend.

And though I was pretty picky about what I was looking for, I learned all too often that there is a difference between how a guy presents himself in answers to questions in an online profile and how he actually acts sitting in front of you, over too many glasses of Sangria. Read More »

Why Do We Have Sex?

Why do people have sex? Seems about as obvious as Ms. Star Jones having weight loss surgery, but apparently it is not.In a recent study published in Archives of Sexual Behavior (I actually saw this study on the Today Show), 2,000 people were asked why they had sex.

The answer? Well, surprisingly, there were more than one. 237 reasons, to be exact.

The top three most popular responses for both men and women seemed the most obvious:
1. They were attracted to the person
2. They wanted to experience physical pleasure
3. “It feels good�

The other 234 reasons were random, interesting and – sometimes – scary.

Some included: to burn calories, for revenge, to make babies, to get closer to the person, to get closer to God and to pass STDs onto someone else (yikes!).

My personal reasons for having sex: Read More »