The Youth Vote: We Can Be Bought

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A growing sense of disdain for Dubya didn’t cut it. Being able to register at the DMV just didn’t do the trick either. P. Diddy couldn’t get us to do it, for Christ’s sake. So just what will it take to seriously win the youth vote? We are, after all, 20 million strong and dammit we deserve to be wooed!

I, for one, would like to see an increase in, shall we say, “game” from candidates both blue and red. McCain, obviously, has taken a step toward this lofty goal by recruiting the support of one of our high holy leaders. Sorry, Obama, that you have neglected to secure such a prestigious pledge of loyalty from the chosen generation (us, duh) but feel free to borrow any of these gems that I think would increase voter turnout for those of the youthful persuasion. You see gentlemen, the key to our hearts is to manipulate our basic dependence upon the following:

Natty Lite
Slap some platform positions on the back of those bad boys and cover up the saddening nutrition facts–we don’t need to see that anyways. I consider this a double-edged sword. Not only would the important issues be readily at hand (provided you go coozie-less), but additionally, voters can appreciate the conversational lubrication that is cheap beer. As inspiring as 4.2% alcohol can be to philosophical convos (if you drink, don’t EVEN pretend you’ve never been there post bar crawl!) that stuff takes a while to imbibe, making those discussions last just a wee bit longer. Now that a pseudo intellectual discush has gone down, both candidates have enjoyed spirited (literally) debate over their issues that should inspire sober consideration come November. Read More »

A Chat With WWE Diva And Playboy Covergirl Maria

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She’s made Ric Flair fall face first with a kiss, she has an irresistible smile, she cancan take body slams, and most importantly she loves babies and puppies. She’s none other then WWE Diva turned Playboy Covergirl, Maria Kanellis.

Maria won wrestling fans hearts with her ditzy personality (don’t let it fool you), long legs, green doe eyes that melt even the coldest heart, and her gestures of blowing kisses to the crowd. Maria was kind enough to take time out of her busy schedule to talk to COED about everything from wrestling, life, and Barry Manilow?! Read More »