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In the wake of the Olympics, it’s easy to forget that there are other contests out there–sexier contests. No, not beauty pageants. We’re talking about the wonderful world of competitive pole dancing. What was once a device only used for turning men on at the strip club has turned into a favorite piece of equipment for dancers, gymnasts and, yes, strippers who work it for the crowds.
Check out competitive pole dancing video after the jump! Read More »
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Controversial wide receiver Terrell Owens has signed a four-year, $34 million deal with the Dallas Cowboys. Along with the $7 million he will make in 2008, T.O. is slated to earn $27 million over the next three seasons, making him one of the highest paid players in the league.
What to do with all that money?
As TMZ reports, the strip club might be the best place to start saying, “Terrell Owens ventured out into the wilds of the Hampton’s Lily Pond nightclub to study the rare, indigenous, feather-tailed go-go bird in its natural environment.”
By our calculations, with his new contract at 100 $1 bills per minute, T.O. could “Make It Rain” on strippers for 5,666 hours or 236 days straight.
That’s a hell of a weather front, if you ask me.
Son-of-a-b*tch! For some ridiculous reason, Texas has a law that forbids strippers from getting within 3-feet of their customers. (Do you know how far 3-feet is when boobs are involved?) And according to TheSmokingGun.com, because of this completely impractical law, they busted 18 innocent–I’m sure–women yesterday, who forgot to pack a tape measure in their g-string.
But it get’s worse.
Now that you’re properly pissed, I have to provide a disclaimer, before you peruse the gallery: Strippers aren’t always hot. The girl above is pretty fly, but at some strip clubs, that can be rare; just because she covers her body in glitter, that soft, sweet stripper smell, and takes off her clothes in the dark doesn’t mean she looks like a Pussycat Doll. Read More »
In a world where strippers make more money than most political figures, is it wrong to teach the youth of today the art of pole-dancing?
The answer is a resounding YES.
In Australia, kids - I’m talking kids, like 7-year-old girls and boys - are being registered (by their parents, mind you) to take pole-dancing lessons.
Yes: everybody knows that strippers are well-toned athletes and intense trainers that go for the Olympic Gold every time they bleach their ******* and dollar bills get stuffed straight up their G-strings by old pervs.
When did throwing the ball around become too passe? When I was a strapping young man I would chop wood and shingle roofs to get my bod looking like this guys.
Now we have kids not old enough to handle their no-no parts correctly gyrating and shimmying up stripper poles in the name of exercise.
Grab an axe and chop away, young boy - at the very least you’ll be able to fend off anybody who attempts to kick your ass when they hear about your past experience sliding down a stripper pole.
And girls? Don’t worry - you’ll have plenty of time in the future to handle poles.
Britney Spears VMA comeback will include hordes of dancers zipping around in harnesses mid-air and a “Disappearing Act” through a set of mirrors courtesy of magician Criss Angel. It’s great to see Spears back in music. (NY Daily News)
Two bozos busted by cops over sketchy marijuana broccoli exchange. Apparently, oregano was out of stock at the local supermarket. (The Morning Call)
IBM is developing a chip no bigger than a speck of dust that can hold about 1,000 trillion bits of data. World domination is only months away! (Information Week)
Forbes releases top crop of the world’s most powerful women. Surprisingly, strippers were omitted from the list. (CNN)
Some politicians debate on issues via live television, others stuff taxpayers money up a stripper’s G-string. They handle politics differently in Australia, as evidenced by the scandalous happenings with Kevin Rudd at a strip club four-years ago in New York City that have only been unveiled recently.
So, who’s the provider of this dirty inside information just in time for election season?
None other than whistle-blower/cock-blocker Rupert Murdoch. Read More »
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